


One Shots And Snap Shots - OR - The stories that didn't make it in to Getting to Know Daryl Dixon

by Butterflyfish



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-19 14:27:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22545748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Butterflyfish/pseuds/Butterflyfish
Summary: Universe and character building for my WIP series Getting to Know Daryl Dixon. You probably need to know that series otherwise these won't make much sense.General outtakes, extra scenes, deleted scenes, and thoughts that didn't make it.I will try to keep these in chronological order.
Relationships: Daryl Dixon/ Abra Reid, Daryl Dixon/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	1. 1.0 Between finding eachother and sleeping together, there was chemistry.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Peeling away the layers of a redneck - OR - How to Love Daryl Dixon](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4138890) by [Butterflyfish](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Butterflyfish/pseuds/Butterflyfish). 



> There is more to Abra and Daryl in my long running series than what is shown within the series.  
> There is a lot of behind the scenes, in my head, world building and relationship building that I haven't shared. Things I have had to cut from stories, things I wanted to cut from stories.  
> But you know what? I thought, I should keep these somewhere other than my head, as it is getting too full of that stuff and there is no room for the future stuff I want to write.  
> So here we are, snapshots and memories, world building and relationship making. All in snippets and short stories.  
> Enjoy if it's your thing, move along, please, if not xx

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the first part of my series, Daryl and Abra meet, and eventually end up in a weird rough relationship, but the chemistry is built seemingly in a single chapter, months into Abra's stay at the prison.  
> Here, we build a little more gradually, and we see why Abra might be so taken with the man who may well have saved her life in the woods around the prison - and perhaps he does so again before they ever go on that first run 'alone' together.

I gratefully ate the slop plonked in front of me on that first morning. It was over cooked, far too hot, and the powdered milk just added a gritty sandiness I was sure should not have been present, but I ate it, and I said thank you. The morning before I had eaten nothing, after sleeping on a bed of dirt, which followed nothing for dinner, and nothing for lunch.

I had had a shower when I arrived at the prison. I was given my own room, and introduced to people I was sure were just as grateful as I was.

I found myself trying to hunt out Daryl and Glenn, mostly Daryl. It was silly, but I felt I owed him so much, a thank you, a hug, some token of appreciation. Of course I would have nothing he wanted. Still I searched for him, eyes all over the room at once, meeting so many eyes as they went, until I realised most people were seeking _me_ out. The new girl. Mysterious and novel. Perhaps some even recognised me.

I didn't like it, despite seemingly having all eyes on me in the 'before', often bright flashing lights blinded me to them. In the present you could only assume people wanted the worst for you, of you, and if they didn't it was a neat surprise.

I found him eventually, and the rest of the mess hall kind of melted into the distance. The days were cooling so fast, but a sheen of sweat stood out against his bare arms, his muscles pushed taut against his skin after some manual work or other had him sweating in the morning sun. He was chatting to Maggie near the double doors, and as I watched, horrified, he nodded in my direction, caught my eye, hesitated, and left the room.

I felt myself colour from toe to hairline, and wished I could disappear. How embarrassing to be caught staring at him like a piece of meat! Then Maggie was walking towards me with a goofy grin on her face, and the world suddenly came to life all around me again.

"Abra, right?" Maggie was Georgia, through and through, she was homely, and sweet and she had already welcomed me so warmly the previous day when her husband, which happened to be Glenn, introduced us. I nodded, smiling, all childish thoughts of Daryl, gone.

For a moment, at least.

* * *

"I saw you, just now."

"Y'out of ya mind." I tried to dismiss Carol's observations, but she was adamant.

"You were pretty much drooling all over yourself, I almost handed you a napkin." Thing was, I probably had been peeking over, I hadn't saved many stragglers at that point, and I needed to know that she was doing ok. Everyone was staring, and whispering, making her uncomfortable. Glenn said she was famous, before, but I didn't know who she was. I did happen to notice that her legs went all the way up, and up and up. I asked Maggie to make friends, that was all. Catching Abra catching me looking, that was unexpected, to say the least.

"Maybe I was hungry, salivating."

"Not for what I was serving up." I was just fascinated by those legs and, all that dark hair. Those big green eyes.

I chewed my lip, Carol smirked her knowing smirk. What could I do but walk away? There was nothing sensible or adult to add the conversation.

* * *

He hadn't been to breakfast for a few days. I knew he was around, I hadn't seen him come or go from the main gates, and no one talked liked he'd gone away.

People had stopped staring and whispering at and around me. I felt more comfortable, more at home, but I liked to keep a watch at the towers, keep an eye out for danger. It would be all too easy to assume we were perfectly safe, that would never be the case again.

Sometimes I even liked to go out on runs, hunting, horse riding, by myself or with others, to clear my head, or just get some space. To remind myself that the dangers were still very present, even if I was a million miles away from my tarpaulin camp in the woods. I was allowed to go outside, as part of my pay back for room and board, because I was fast. One of the fastest. If we needed something urgently, I was the one sent, if we needed help, I ran to get it. I was nimble, and speedy, and I was glad that Rick, the leader of that prison, could see it.

But I caught myself looking for Daryl in that mess hall like a kid with a crush, not an adult with a job to do, so I pulled myself together, grabbed up my breakfast things, and handed them to Karen, who was on washing up duty that particular day. she smiled, and thanked me, and I smiled right on back, looking forward to my shower, no matter how cold the water promised to be.

Without thinking, without accepting that there was no such thing as 'his and hers' anymore, I began to strip off my clothes, my long sleeved tee went straight over my head almost as soon as I heard the door soft close behind me.   
  
I folded it and placed it on the bench seat in the centre of the room, then loosened the button on my jeans before stretching my hands above my head, feeling the jeans drop a little at my waist. I'd shrunk so much since the dead got up, it was pitiful.

I didn't hear him come out of the shower behind me, I didn't realise he was there until I heard his sharp intake of breath. I turned and he was backing up against the shower stall, gripping his towel for dear life, trying to avert his eyes.

I felt myself pink, from toe to scalp again, and froze. Bra and underpants on show, I just stood there, taken in by his large expanse of chest. I swallowed, stumbled over my own feet as my leaden legs finally started moving again, and I turned away, coughed nervously...

"Sorry" I mumbled, trying not to think of his slightly erect nipples, a bead of water running down his chest, leaving a trail of gooseflesh "I.... I didn't realise:-"

"Why would ya?" he asked, pretty coldly. "I'll get outta ya hair" and like that, I heard him stomp away, most uncharacteristically.

* * *

I dressed in about two seconds flat, leaving my wet towel on the floor which would drive whoever was doing laundry that day insane, but I had to get out of there before some animal need in me took over. It had been a long time since I'd seen a woman I was mildly attracted to in her underwear, and now my mind was wondering about her out of it.

My t-shirt clung miserably to my still damp body, and my worn out jeans scraped irritatingly on the tops of my bare feet, but I weren't about to hang around for her to stare at, and judge, the body I was still so ashamed of. It would be a long time before she wore that shame in me down to nothing. 

I almost ran straight into Rick, who stopped me with a hand on my shoulder.

"Hey, you ok?" he asked me, genuinely concerned. I should have talked to him about it, I could have, he'd have had better advice than Carol, sarcasm queen, but I didn't, I shook my head, and walked on by, feet slapping the cold hard concrete beneath them, wondering how the heck I was going to retrieve my boots.

I needn't have worried.

It was maybe half an hour, maybe only 20 minutes later I heard an overly polite cough beyond my cage's curtain, which for the record was essentially a black blanket. I hesitated, before answering, knowing full well it was Abra, and not knowing what she was going to want, or to say. I pulled the curtain back and tried to look her in the eye.

"Hey" I said, noticing what she had in her hand, dangling at her side. My boots.

"You, left them, behind" She said at length, quietly. She shrugged "Not sure how you managed that." She gave a gentle breath of a laugh as she held them out, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Thanks" I said, as I took the proffered shoes from her. Then we both just stood, silent, awkward. She didn't try to look in on my room, in fact she hardly looked up from her feet. It's so hard to look someone in the eye when they look everywhere but at you. I didn't know if she expected more than just a thank you, but I had nothing to give. I'd already apologised for catching her half naked.

"You better put those on," She said suddenly, now speaking at a rate of knots that I could only just about follow. "Your feet must be freezing." She crossed her arms, rubbed at her own biceps, uncrossed her arms again, then nodded at me. "Ok, well," She started, but then turned and left without another word. I watched her go for half a second longer than I should have, and a few steps away she stopped and put her hand to her face, like maybe she'd sneeze, but she lowered it again without a sound and carried on walking away.

* * *

It had been a few weeks since the stupid incident with the boots. Forever imprinted in my mind as "The Day Abra Forgot How to Human". Rick had asked a few of us to go on a run, Judith needed more formula, some of the kids had grown so fast that they needed new clothes for the winter, which was just over the horizon. Leaves were turning, fall was well into it's stride.

Glenn, Maggie, Tyreese, Daryl, and me.

I didn't know how easy or not it would be to put my daft crush behind me on a run, I knew I had to be fully present, fully aware of everything around me and not just *him*. I'd have preferred to stay behind, swap my laundry day or something, but Rick insisted that I had a job to do, and the kids were getting cold.

He didn't go on runs, not back then. He was still playing farmer boy.

So I went, I got in the back of the car with Glenn and Maggie while Tyreese rode up front with Daryl, and they all chatted playfully, well, not really Daryl. I stayed quiet, just watching the world go by on the way to the strip mall where there were several stores we could get our supplies from. We passed a single walker chowing down on a cat.

I turned away from the window.

"Abra?!" Maggie asked, expectantly, and I knew I had missed something. I turned to her, feeling confused, and very much like I didn't want to play whatever game they were playing. "Is there anything in particular you need, we'll all keep an eye out." I huffed a short laugh, thinking there was nothing I wanted, but, out of nowhere my mouth replied.

"A photo frame, standard size." no one replied, but I knew what they must have been thinking. I was pretty lucky to have saved a precious photo of a loved one.

Daryl cleared his throat as the silence in the car became too thick to breathe through.

"We're here" he said, pulling in taking up four disabled parking spots. We climbed out into the chill of the day, the sky was a bright and cold blue, edged with grey clouds which threatened to roll in suddenly upon a tide of strong wind.

~~~~~~~~~~

We hit the Walmart as a complete group, having been spread out over the smaller stores for a few hours already. Daryl tapped on the window and the door and we waited outside for any noise. We couldn't rely on the window and door tap though, the building was too big for that to be enough.

When no noise came we entered carefully, one by one, taking up pre discussed positions in the doorway. Maggie and Glenn up front, sweeping their guns left and right in the respective corners, I aimed straight out front and centre, while Daryl and Tyreese took up the rear, checking behind us for hidden danger either side of the doorway.

Once inside we split up to look for various things on various lists we'd split between us. Each run was generally well thought out and planned. Daryl was proud to say they hadn't lost anyone in several months.

I hoped I wasn't about to change that, I almost did.

The place had been almost cleared out, as was to be expected by then I guess, big store? of course it had been targeted, and I was balanced on an overturned shopping cart next to a ridiculously high towering display of kids shoes. To save space we had to try for specific sizes. Searching through I over reached and the cart slid beneath me, sending me toppling head over ass into the shoe display, there was an awful noise, but I was ok. I said so

"I'm alright!" As Daryl and Tyreese appeared at the head of the aisle, wondering what the heck I was doing. "I fell" I explained, their concerned faces comical to me, Daryl's eyes narrowed, he nodded and went on his way. I narrowed mine at his back, hating his broodiness all of a sudden.

I moved on, my spoils mounting up in my pack until there was almost no more room. We were coming to then end of our Walmart tour when Glenn excitedly called my name and threw something at me. I caught his missile and turned it over in my hands. It was plain but it was perfect, a frame for Ben's photo.

It's hard to explain to anyone who isn't a twin, I never thought of him as 'oooh my twin' he was just my brother, but we had a bond I don't think non twins can possibly have, and he was the most precious thing in my whole world. I was so grateful. I didn't know how to express it, so I just put the frame in my pack, looked up to thank him in some way, and found myself face to face with a walker.

I had no idea where it came from, or what was going through my mind - perhaps it was the unexpected shock, but rather than pull out my knife and stab it through the skull, I turned on my heel and tried to run. I knew I was fast, and much faster than the assholes, but I was clumsy, I was heavily laden with my pack, and I had made the most stupid decision.

I got a few steps, maybe five, back to the head of my aisle, when my foot caught, and I tumbled to a heap on the floor. I could hear the moans of the undead thing shambling towards me, it's feet barely lifting from the cheap tiled floor, could smell it's rotten breath and flesh get stronger as it closed in. My damn boot had come untied, and now, sprawled on the floor and pulling desperately, my knife was caught in its holster, whether because I was panicked, or because it was so old and worn.

I turned to watch as the rotten creature, once a male with thick thighs and strong arms, stumbled forward for me, arms reaching, moans becoming more eager.

I was convinced this was the end, I tried to push myself away, raking my heels along the floor but they just squeaked and scraped, and I knew, I KNEW that I was finished when the thing before me began to lean forward.

But it's voice was cut off, a bolt appeared through it's forehead and it's forward momentum hesitated for a second, before it fell on top of me. In my state, my disbelief, I was sure it was still trying to get me. I wriggled beneath it in hysteria, my breath coming in big gulps as I almost hyperventilated in fear.

"Ya bit?" Daryl, but I couldn't reply, I couldn't catch my breath. "Get it offa her!" I heard, and the creature was suddenly gone, and Daryl was in my face as I still struggled to calm myself down. His face was pure worry. "Hey" He soothed, quietly "Are ya bit, did he get ya?" I shook my head, no, It was all I could do in reply. Daryl nodded and took my hand, raising me to my feet in a swift motion. I was shaken, but I was ok. "We're done here" he said to the others gathered around. Maggie looked at Glenn, something passed between them without a word, and I felt suddenly conscious that I made myself look stupid. "Lets go." he said more urgently, and we got back into formation.


	2. 2.0 In sickness and in health, 'til the Governor do us part.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two of the series focuses on what happened after the governor struck the Prison, and how Abra and Daryl find the others from the prison.  
> Here, I will rather explore Abra and Daryl between her illness (See part one) and the governor's attack.

I held the crossbow at my eye, it was damned heavy, and I was still a little wobbly on my feet after spending so much of my time just in my 6x8 cell. Daryl's arms snaked around mine, and an involuntary shiver chased down my spine. He held the crossbow with me, as I aimed at the bush where I knew the rabbits were, and waited.

We'd stalked them all morning, just me and him, as he finally agreed that, actually, we might not have the prison forever, and I may need to learn how to hunt, skin, and maybe even use different weapons.

"Aim a little higher" Daryl told me for the hundredth time, but he never lost his patience with me. He was a good teacher. I aimed a little higher, knowing the theory but executing it like shit, like I always did. It was his presence, he made me feel all subconscious and silly, like I still had a crush on him. I guess that's the thing with that whole 'honeymoon period' it's giggly and daft and makes you seem stupid. It was bad enough when we talked about cocking the 'bow and pushing the butt into my shoulder. 

His hands were on mine now, warm, his breath on the back of my neck so gentle, moving the hair there that still stuck out at crazy angels where he'd hacked off my pony tail in the hopes of getting me out of danger. He was trying to distract me, he'd done it before, chastising me when I went gooey for him, telling me that I needed to work with distractions.

I told him if I was using the crossbow and being distracted in that way he'd better hope we made it out together.

That hadn't gone down well.

So there I was, aiming for the sky to balance out the gravitational pull or some shit I didn't quite understand, hoping to catch some bunnies for dinner while my lover caressed me and breathed on me in the hopes I might learn how to deal with distraction.

The bushes moved ever so slightly as I watched them in my sight, Daryl's hand firmed up on mine a little.

"Deep breaths" He said, darkly, and I did as asked, although I did wonder if I would have time for that if it wasn't food I was after, but rather a horde of walkers thinking _I_ was food. The thought brought unbidden memories back to me quicker than I thought it would, and I blinked them away "Steady," Daryl whispered, not knowing why I suddenly swayed a little on my feet. I blinked away the memories, pushed my cheek into the stock, and squinted through the sight, a little nose, nervous whiskers, For a moment I thought I couldn't do it, but with barely a breath I already had. "Wait" Daryl said, forcing me to hold my ground, finish my exhale, before moving off.

"Shit" I exclaimed as he let me lower the crossbow.

"Great shot." He smiled triumphant as I turned to him, my own shocked smile on my face, a goofy grin. He darted forward ahead of me, grabbing the rabbit by it’s back feet and pulling the bolt all the way though. 

* * *

I took a lungful of smoke in and watched as Abra discussed something animatedly with Carl and Beth. I wondered if she knew I Was watching, the way she tucked the trimmed ends of her hair behind her ear and threw a glance over her shoulder towards me, but not quite seeing me. She always said she knew when I followed her outside the fences.

Watching her talk to the kids, knowing that she had a giant hickey on the inside of her left thigh, next to a small mole the colour of her hair, knowing how she looked in the moonlight just hours before, naked and writhing, was like knowing a secret. I chewed my lip, toeing out the cigarette before walking over.

"What's so exciting over here?" I asked as Beth and Carl fell into fits of laughter. Abra turned to me, a broad smile on her face.

"Hey, you." She said, leaning forward and kissing my cheek, barely touching her lips to my skin. I Was never one for public displays of affection, but she didn't make much of it. She didn't grab my hand or throw her arms around my neck.

"We'll leave you two alone" Beth said, which was met with rolled eyes from Carl. We watched them go in friendly silence for moment.

"Wanna go back to the lake" I said matter of fact to her, still watching Beth and Carl flirt together as they walked away. I felt Abra stiffen beside me

"No" She said. There was no anger in her voice, but she was firm. "I'm not ready to do that." She said plainly, honestly.

"Hafta, sometime" I replied, we still hadn't looked each other in the eye, but now she turned to face me, eyes cold and hard, arms folded stiffly under her bust.

"Not yet, It's too raw, I'm barely healed." It was true, there was still a slight limp where the walkers had torn into the skin of the back of her ankle, her Achilles tendon only just barely surviving our stupidity of being out there in the first place.

I blamed myself. I would forever. But she had to go back, we both did. Worst thing would be to be scared fo the place forever, making it so much bigger in our minds than it ever truly was, is, would be. It was a bad time, but it was one time. Staying in would only make us soft. She knew it. Her eyes said so.

"Anywhere else." She emphasised anywhere, a blink of her eyes, a tilt of her body, I suggested a place. I knew a few. we still liked to keep our relationship away from the Prison, like it made a damned difference. It was less of a distraction, I guess, for us, for others, if we kept it as under wraps as we could. Not that it mattered. Not in the end.Abra liked to think we were still just fuck buddies, but I knew different. Shit everyone did. 

* * *

All long running jokes have to start somewhere.   
The one where ‘Carol doesn’t love Daryl like that they’re just best friends’ started back at the prison.

Carol and I were working together on the kids lesson plan, because I helped out with teaching back then, when Daryl appeared in front of us, we looked up in unison, and a smile crept forward from one side of his mouth. I laughed, the worst of explanations for that smile going through my head, but Carol responded with

"Well, hi, Pookie, what can we do for you?" I felt my eyes narrow, the nickname causing me pause, but not concern. Carol looked up at Daryl with the simplest smile on her face, just waiting for something to go down. Daryl hated the daft nickname, I can only assume that was what the smile was for.

"Uh, I, Uh..." Daryl seemed uncharacteristically put off, I frowned slightly, looked at him.

"Daryl, what's going on?" I asked, meaning his bumbling lack of point. He looked at me, stopped stumbling over his words, eyes wide.

"Nothin'" He said sharply. "Ain't nothin', Carol, I don't..." He became more flustered, and I couldn't help but watch, awed by Carol's incredible power of him. He left, making no point, saying nothing but broken words, and I said to her

"You'll have to teach me how to do that." She smiled and bumped my shoulder with hers.

"Oh it's easy when you know how."

And that was it, that was how the joke started.

I miss her, often.

* * *

We argued a lot, back in the beginning. I always liked to think it was a passion thing, we were full of the passion of new lovers, and it just kept spilling over because in our situation you can't just keep collapsing into bed when the feeling takes hold. I still tell myself that.

Truthfully, I had never felt how I did and I didn't know how to deal with it. Everything I loved had left me in one way or another, sometimes I thought I would pre-empt her and make her leave, and then it would be me that made it happen and somehow I thought that would be easier to cope with. Easier than if she left me because she wanted to. The world around us could have taken her at any moment, but that was entirely different.

So yeah, part passion overspill part pre-emptive attack, I think I somehow tried to push her away, one day she snapped. I nearly destroyed everything.

People all around us started to get sick, a flu or a virus sweeping through the prison, could have taken us all down like flies if we weren't careful. We quarantined the sick, If I could have, I would've quarantined Abra as well. She wasn't exactly up for that though.

"Who's to say I didn't start it?" She asked, referring to her fever. I shook my head.

"Hershel says this shit runs fast through close quarters." I said, my bandanna muffling my voice. "You were sick weeks ago." she huffed a little, rolled her eyes.

"I'll come to the university" She said, firmly. "I'll help out"

"Ya still limping, don't matter what happens we always end up runnin'" She shrugged her shoulders at me, I strained not to roll my eyes at her, "Abs:-"

"No." She cut me off, all but stamped her foot. "And take that bandanna off, I can barely understand you at the best of times" We'd just lost Zack not long before, I didn't want to lose Abs on a run, not ever.

"You'll hold us up, get us all killed" I said without thinking. I knew before I'd finished what I had done. I watched as Abra folded her arms, raised an eyebrow and bit her lip to keep from screaming at me.

"Oh I'm coming with you." she said, turning and heading back to her cell to gather some things. The pure fact she didn't yell or curse at me should have warned me there was a storm brewing. I should have known. But the run wasn't about us, we had people we were responsible for, and a hell of an important job to do.

So screw her and her attitude, and my mouth running off before I could stop it. It weren't about us.

~~~~~~~~

"I'm fed up of losing people, too" She said by way of explanation as she threw her pack in the trunk, though I got the feeling she weren't speaking to me.

With Tyreese, Bob and Michonne, we had a car full, and we headed out towards the veterinary college as fast as I dare. The tension in the car was almost a physical thing, Tyreese stewing over Karen, Bob and Tyreese both worried about Sasha, and Abra sitting silently cursing my name, it was a pretty heavy ride out. 

It was at the College that it all really went to shit. After it already had at the gas station, and before on the road.

"That was your fault" Abra admonished in a hiss, and Michonne gave her a passing glance over her shoulder.

"No use sulking about it now, it's over." Bob chimed in, trying to be helpful, but winding me up more.

"I thought I was the one who was gonna get us all killed." Abra wasn't letting it slide, and now we were right on top of getting shit done, and I needed her to firm her mouth before I went over and did it for her. Not that I Would but my god that woman can flap her jaw.

"Did ya die?" I asked her, and she narrowed her eyes as I pounded on the door. "Got a damn job to do, people back home relying on us"

"Do we need to split you two up?" Michonne asked as I kicked the door in, a cloud of dust greeting us all. I gave her a look, she raised an eyebrow.

"Nah, we're good." I poked my head into the dark hallway, the dust and grime at the windows had left the building cold and uninviting. When I had the coast clear I beckoned everyone else in, and we got to searching the place.

~~~~~~~~

"Looks like someone already ransacked this hole" Abra said, righting an overturned chair, checking a glass cabinet for supplies. Michonne, Bob and Tyreese had gone in separate directions looking with their own lists. I needed to keep Abra nearby. She tapped on the glass with her knife, the one I got her, and the glass shattered into tiny pieces, "Fuck!" she hissed "Whatever happened to damn safety glass?" She was holding onto her wrist with her left hand, and I was by her side before I realised I was moving.

"Lemme see" I said, but she firmed her grip

"Just a scratch, come on, we have important work to do." The last was said in a mocking drawl, but I left it well alone, the glass shattering could have alerted any walkers to our presence, and Abra was already bleeding all over the carpet. She was still chuckling away to herself, packing Acetaminophen and bottles of capsules into her backpack when the noise hit me from the door we'd entered by, right next to the cabinet.

"Abs"

"I'm fine!" She said, humming and counting packs of pills. I figured she was just gonna be a pain in my ass, so I grabbed her rather than called her again, dragging her towards me and the opposite door. Pills spilled at her feet, and she cursed me under her breath, I pushed her through the door without looking first.

"Ya fucking deaf now, too?" I accused as we fell into the relative safety of the hallway. She looked at me and shrugged her shoulders

"What?" and I about saw red. I chewed my lip to keep from pummelling the wall in my frustration. A walker threw itself against the door behind me, and I ducked away from it, my heart already beating too fast in my chest.

"You're a piece of work" I said to her, watching as she struggled to bandage her own wrist with something she'd found. She looked up at me as the makeshift wrap fell away for the third time.

"I'm just living up to expectations of me, Daryl." She gave me a small, genuine, slightly sad smile. "Haven't got to aim too high, so that's good." I took a breath, and let it out very slowly to calm myself down, but before I had finished exhaling there was a crash from another classroom and we both went running.

Abra looked in through the window at the door, her bandage now hanging uselessly at her side. I thought I could help her clean herself up, but a yelp from inside the room stopped me offering. Abra's hand was on the handle already, she turned to me with the most serious look I'd seen all day.

"Two walkers, Bob, come on." she said in a rush, pulling the door open and storming in almost head first. She stabbed on through the back of the neck, I got the other through the eye with a handheld bolt. Bob was thankful, but suddenly coy. He hugged his pack to him and moved towards yet another door. If we weren't careful we were gonna get lost.

"Walkers out there have got the red eyes." He said "Couldn't kill 'em, cause of the infection. Last thing we want is to take back more of the sick." I gave him a nod

"We were chased this way by the same damn thing, but the hallway was clear, come on, we'll find Ty and Michonne and get out of here."

~~~~~~~~

I don't know how we got to be where we were, how we were, but I was staring, in some kind of shock, at Abra's damned dangling bandage, now in the grips of a bloody eyed walker, who was slowly pulling her towards him, from where she was sprawled on the floor. She was panting, frightened, and I was trying my hardest to keep one off my ass, and Tyreese was trying to knock a locked door down. Michonne finally stepped up and sliced the creature's head off, and while Abra sat on the floor gathering herself again, Michonne did me a favour too, and everyone was safe, as Tyreese continued attacking the door.

He pounded rhythmically, and I knew in his head he was pounding whoever killed Karen and david, and I thought I knew who it was, but what could I say? I chewed my thumb, Abra gathered herself, Tyreese knocked the door out and we were on a roof, and what happened with Bob happened with Bob, I'll die before I relive that shit again.

"I'm sorry, for what I said" I told Abra once I knew the medicine was where it needed to be. I wrapped her wrist in clean bandages we'd scavenged and she let me without emotion. "I don't think that."

"It must have been in your head at some time, to have come out of your mouth" She said, disappointed, not looking at me and walked away to her cell.

* * *

I don't know where Daryl was when the Governor turned up. I wasn't even sure that was who he was, just a dude, with a tank, who came knocking on our door with a bomb to the lookout tower. I thought I had gone deaf, it was so loud, and I watched the flames spread through the few belongings some of us left up there. A book I hadn't finished, a picture one of the kids drew for Maggie, the bed, the sheets. It all went up like kindling. 

I tried not to think how it was my shift after sundown. which wasn't far away. I tried to keep that as far from my mind as possible.

Rick, Daryl and Tyreese came out of the building together, almost instantaneously with everyone else, and I wondered about Hershel and Michonne, who had gone to burn out the dead away from the fences. We’d lost a lot to that infection. It had a lot to answer for. I watched Maggie and Beth approach the gates in confusion, I followed their gazes, feeling surprisingly calm.

Maybe numb was the word. 

I watched, frozen, numb, guts sinking, as Hershel tumbled to one side, as Maggie and Beth screamed, as guns started going off around me. Daryl have a raw guttural grunt and started shooting, too, and my God it was weird to see Carl with a gun.

My stomach flipped over, and I felt myself being pulled by the sleeve out of the open, towards some sort of shelter, everything began to move in slow motion. I saw Daryl ahead of me, and my fogged you’re brain just told me to head for him.

”the bus!” someone yelled, but leaving Daryl wasn’t an option. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That run to the hospital explains why they’re both a bit pissed at each other once they flee the Prison.


	3. Deep discussions under the moonlight after a drunken argument

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In my Abra and Daryl version of ‘Alone’ Abra and Daryl get drunk on Whiskey and have a massive fight. Then we meet them again chatting by moonlight before crashing into each other’s genitals yet again.  
> Here I explore whatever else they might have spoken about from before.

“So how old were you when you lost your virginity?” I looked up at the stars, sitting on the little cabin’s rickety porch. Daryl huffed a half laugh, but it wasn’t a joke to me. If this was going to be a thing I’d like to know him, better and more deeply than anyone else did. “I’m serious. Come on what else are we gonna do, start drinking again?” Daryl sat upright suddenly, hating that idea.

”I’m not sure. 15?” I sputtered the mouthful of water I’d taken. 

“Jesus! So young.” I found myself almost shouting, and Daryl pinked a little around his temples. 

”Well what about you?” He asked quietly, sullenly. I shrugged my shoulders 

“Oh, 17? Maybe. It was a guy called Ross Paxman, I kinda didn’t want to, but, peer pressure, you know?” Daryl scoffed

”Your friends were there?” I laughed and shook my head at him.

”No! But everyone else was at it, you know? And Ross kept on and every time I knocked him back he made me feel so bad...” I stopped talking, Daryl’s face was thunder. I rubbed his knee gently “Hey, I consented, ok? Just kinda regretted it after is all.” I scratched my arm and gulped down a little more water, hoping my heavy head from the alcohol might eventually clear. “So, what happened with you?” Daryl sighed, leant back on his elbows stretching his legs out in front of him. He was thoughtful in his silence, and I found myself thinking that Ross and all my friends from high school were probably dead, and if any survived, which side of the prison fence would they stand on?

”Her name was Jessie, and she was older’n me, by quite a way.” His shoulders lifted as he smiled at a secret memory. “She used to hang around with my Merle n them, n I think it was a dare.” My heart sank for him, but his smile broadened a little and he nudged my foot with his own. “Don’t feel bad” he said, reading my mind. “It was good, all the same. She had the most amazing:-“

”woah!” I cut him off “I’m fine with people having history and baggage but I do not need her damn measurements.” Daryl laughed and sipped his water, leaving me wondering what was so amazing about his brother’s friend Jessie.

”I got drunk for the first time at 14, I never did drugs despite many many offers throughout my life and career.” Daryl snorted, I eyed him carefully.

”Problem Dixon?” I questioned. He snorted softly again.

”I smoked weed a bit, the joys of having Merle as a brother. His mates,” he shook his head “Jesus, bunch’a inbred dead heads”

”If they weren’t then, they probably are now.” I laughed, but it earned me a stern look so I stopped short. Silence fell between us again, light and breezy. This was what I wanted from the alcohol, talking, just being together again after the Hell we’d been through. Sure we had our arguments, but I could have sworn I was falling in love with him, and I couldn’t love someone I barely knew.   
  


“So you were offered drugs through your career? What the Hell you do that they offered you drugs?” I rolled my eyes, I wasn't about to tell him what I used to do, not as long as I could help it. Now, in the world we were living in, it was almost an embarrassment.

I Wanted to ask him about his scars, about his past. I had a feeling in a million years of the apocalypse, a hundred full mooned skies, a thousand drunken arguments, I Would never fully truly know him, not unless I found a thread and pulled it for a while. 

Did it matter? not in the grandest scheme of things, but I wanted to know him better than anyone else in the world knew him. Better than he knew himself. 

I knew there were things about his past, dark things, it was written all over his body language sometimes, I'd had enough therapy to pick up on other's ticks, I guess. I had my demons, even before the walkers, so I opened with that, to see if we could climb into his past if we explored mine a little.

"My daddy used to beat my mom black and blue." I said quietly, my feet suddenly so interesting. It was a weird opener to a new conversation. It wasn't even the direction I meant to go in. Daryl appeared unmoved, didn't question what I was saying, just stared thoughtfully into the sky above us. "One day I came home from school and, God, she was so broken. It's 4o'clock in the afternoon, she's done a bottle of wine already, her face is swollen, and she's not even washed the blood off." I gave a nervous puff of air, a half laugh. Where had this come from? Was I ready to share? No one knew this except our family.

"Ben," My voice shook slightly as I relived the moment, images like a picture show in my head. "Ben was playing B-Ball after school so it was just me, and she turned to me, and she had a manic grin on her face, and I thought, shit, she's finally lost her damn mind, but she hadn't, not really, not in an insane way" I smiled as my eyes welled up, over spilled tears rolling gently down my face.

"But she was strong in what she said, to me" Daryl sidled a little closer to me, his hand reached up and pushed at the hair that had fallen out from behind my ear back again. It was a pain, hair that length, couldn't tie it up.

"She said 'I'm done now, Abra. Mommy's done.' and I knew, I knew exactly what she meant, she grabbed that big green empty bottle and she threw it against the kitchen wall, and little bits of purple wine glittered in the shattered glass and I knew, she was gonna kill him if he set foot near her again." Daryl gave a sigh, and I shrugged, eyes drying up suddenly

"We left then, waited for Ben, packed up and shipped out. She didn't wash the blood off her face the whole time. Not until we got to a motel and she caught sight of herself in a mirror."

"He drink?" Daryl asked, thoughtful, quiet.

"No" I said. "He was a good Christian man, enjoyed the parts of the bible that made him feel like a big strong asshole, and didn't drink but for communion. " I laughed, but there was no humour in it. "I've never missed him. Is that bad?" Daryl shook his head

"Nah, nah that ain't bad. I don't miss my dad. He was a fucking asshole, too." there was bitterness in his voice, a waiver I wasn't sure I'd ever heard before. I looked at him expectantly and he shrugged. "You know," he avoided my gaze "Heavy handed," he shrugged "Was worse when Merle was away, cause Merle was his real punching bag, and Merle could fight back. I think he liked that."

"Merle?" I asked, incredulous.

"Ma dad." Daryl said slowly. "When he had to pick on me instead, I gave in too easily. I was weak." My heart plummeted at that last. I shook my head

"That's not true and you know it." I said vehemently "You are one of the strongest people I know." Daryl shrugged his shoulders.

"I dunno" he said, still not looking at me, like he was ashamed. I frowned at him, annoyed at his disbelief in himself.

"You are" I said, hoping that put a finer point on it.

"I couldn't kill him" he said, watery, soft. "He, he was one'a them n I couldn't." I nodded my head, things were coming together a bit more. "I was out huntin' with ma uncle when the shit hit, well, I guess afta." He hugged his knees close to him, shifting himself away from me slightly. "We headed back home and found Will, dad, looking like Hell, like he was sick, or like, he'd already died but no one tol' him." I knew the look, I knew Will was probably dead or near on dead when they found him. 

He finished his story, shrugged his shoulders at me,

"I was too weak"

"To kill someone you didn't care about? who didn't care about you? Jesus Daryl, you finished Merle off. _Merle_ , your _best friend_ , your _only_ fucking family. That's not weak. not by a long shot. Shit, did you even know anything about the walkers back then?" He shrugged again, sullen looking.


End file.
